Fuck Me Or Destroy Me is an experimental collaboration I created featuring Harnaam Kaur aka The Bearded Dame. The song in the film is written by me and produced by Brooklyn-based DJ and producer, TYGAPAW. My dear friend, film-maker, Tim Travers Hawkins did the filming and editing in London and New York respectively, and the whole thing took about 6 months, starting on an overcast London day in January 2016. I feel so lucky to have worked with Harnaam who is basically the love of my life, and am just really glad she doesn't think it's shit.

I suppose at the heart of this film is an exploration of western body hair norms - how strange and oppressive they are, particularly for queer and trans people of colour whose bodies are already targeted, examined and laid thick with expectation from so many places. I am interested in how we all find moments of agency in this mess and in the false liberation of Harnaam Kaur. How she works so hard to reject and restructure societal oppression, and is defined by her otherness. How her extraordinary personhood is so informed by something that never should have been extraordinary. How her story is imagined for the white gaze. How she feels when everyone is looking. How she feels when no-one is looking. How she looks back.

 

Fuck Me Or Destroy Me was featured in NYLON magazine on 22nd September 2016.

I was interviewed about it for KAJAL MAGAZINE on 27th September 2016.

It was screened at UnionDocs, Brooklyn, for the annual YEAH, THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID film festival on 8th October 2016 in New York and at the Victoria and Albert museum as part of GAL-DEM's Friday Late Take Over on 28th October 2016.

 

You can listen to/download the track here: